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2012年同等学力考试英语作文批改(12)

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Directions: For this part, you are allowed thirty minutes to write a composition on the topic Keeping Pets. You should write at least 120 words and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:

  近年来养宠物的人越来越多,造成的问题也越来越多,这一现象已引起社会各界的关注。人们对这一现象的看法不一,各持已见。
      
1. 你对这个问题的观点是……
       
2. 理由是……
          
3. 结论……

  同等学力英语作文原文:

  The number of persons whom keeping pets is increasing for recently years, as a result many question is following. This phenomenon is concerned widely in society. Persons have several attitutions on this phenomenon.

  My opinion for this phenomenon is positive if keeping pets take situable means. Firstly, animals are people’s good friends in globe, we should conserve their  existence enviorment.  secondly animals can provide much pleasure to people ,for example,mang people bring up dogs for solve their alonely. thirdly keeping pets can  educate  children’s loving heart ,and learn how to takeing care little animals.

  In conclusion ,if people keeping pets take situable means for avoiding  affect  others,  I approve of keeping pets,it will become our life more colourful.

  名师点评:分数:8分。

  你的思路还不错,只是在安排结构上你在第一段就应该阐述你自己的观点,否则你现在的第一段就是多余的。另外,你需要注意单词拼写,大小写和语法问题。还有标点符号的使用及空格问题。相信你只要把这些细节问题攻破后,你的作文水平会有很大的提高。加油哦!

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